It’s 01:45am. I’ve been in bed for two hours, later than my usual time, and much later than the should-time. I’m wide awake, which is highly bewildering given that I’m also intensely tired and have been all day, and have already taken more than one sleep medication. I just tried a sleep meditation and it made me disproportionally angry; probably because I’ve been irrationally angry and anxious all night: An
Anxious due to a mix of whole-body pain, extra pain in a wounded ginger, two major work deliverables with rapidly approaching deadlines that I am unable to find the mental capacity, let alone creativity for.
I’ve tried reading to calm me down, it usually works, but today I want to throw each book I open at the wall within minutes. (The main reason I don’t do it is that they’re ebooks.)
I want to scream into the sky, or at least my pillow.