I read a while ago that there’s a condition that makes it difficult or even impossible for people to swallow medication (dysphagia, describes any difficulty swallowing; I had to look that up, obviously). At the time, I thought it was curious, but I couldn’t quite imagine what it would be like (might just be a sign that I’m very unimaginative). I just took my again-nightly 0.1ml drop of low-dose naltrexone and swooshed it around my mouth for a while until I willed myself into swallowing it; it’s compounded by the pharmacy and the syrupy solution looks a lot like wallpaper adhesive.
I take my 17 morning pills like they’re shots: Pour half or so of them straight into my mouth from the box, take a big glug of water and get them all down in two gos.
I’ve had to spend all weekend working to meet a deadline tomorrow at 9am. Feels like the LDN may be helping a bit again, I don’t think I would’ve managed to pull through otherwise. Now I’m beyond tired and try not too think too hard about the crash I set myself up for on a silver platter.
A friend sent me a screenshot of an instagram ad featuring me, the photo was taken at an event I participated in. I look incredible in the picture. I tried to date it which proved tricky because my outfits used to all be so similar.
I have an ME/CFS face now, all puffy and most of all just sad and so so so tired. I don’t recognize myself in photos anymore. I’ve stopped taking selfies. (I’ve been trying to start it again to get more acquainted with my new face. It’s just felt like another chore.)
I got a new smart watch a few weeks ago to use as a health tracker. I was intrigued by it for a few weeks, but six weeks in, I got so frustrated with it that I turned all its notifications off. It something is telling me that I’ve been having too much stress and not enough sleep, well, no shit, and it’s not for lack of trying.